Tuesday, Jan. 20, 2004
fuck you all
its funny how people say they'll call, or you leave a message and ask them to call you back, they never FUCKING do
AND where do people get off on emailing me telling me what i should and shouldnt be doing, how i should think this through, and how i dont seem to be taking this SERIOUSLY
if only they fucking knew that i get sick here, i cant function on my own, how i cry myself to sleep each night, trails of blood and sweat fall from my skin
IF ONLY THEY HAD A FUCKING CLUE
no one does these days
this is what i am choosing to do
this is how i want to live my life
i refuse to spend my life doing things i hate
i dont want to end up bitter and twisted like so many other people
i want to enjoy myself and smile everyday
i will NOT turn out like my father who hates everyday he goes to work and tells me so each time i tell him im leaving, how i have to stick at things, how giving up is sometimes not an option
FUCK YOU
there are more important things that doing something that earns you money, there are better things to be doing with four years than hating each and every minute, being stuck in a place you hate
SCREW YOU
he says im an adult and im entitled to make my own decisions but with that he implies the mistakes and fuck ups he is wanting me to make
AND i know when i hate something and i KNOW this is NOT a mistake
i could tell you a thousand different times i have been in places and situations that i have hated and made me feel so sick
and this is just another one
i WONT be stuck in this place and i WONT be stuck in a life that i DONT want to be living
thissidedown at 10:35 am